Our Best Tips to Get Your Child to Talk About School
You pick up your child from school and ask them how their day went. If you’re lucky, they may grunt a one-word answer like “fine.” But, sometimes, they don’t answer you at all.
Even more mysterious, the teacher tells you that your student is the life of the party, or that she always raises her hand to answer questions, or that he spends the whole class talking to his friends. Or on the other hand, you may find out that your child is struggling in math, doodles during independent reading, or hasn’t turned in any homework.
Whether your child is thriving in school or could use some extra help, you can support your child better when you know how to get them to talk about school.
Why Is It Important for Your Child to Talk About School?
Knowing what’s going on in their day is essential whether your child is in kindergarten or high school. There are many problems a child may need help navigating in the school setting. These problems could include the following:
- Struggling to understand lessons
- Falling behind in classwork/homework
- Problems with specific teachers
- Interpersonal problems with classmates
- Bullying
For many children, it can be challenging to bring these problems up with a parent. They may not know how to approach the concern with you or feel embarrassed about asking for help. Thankfully, the more you take an interest in your child’s school day, the more likely they’ll come to you when they have a problem.
What Happens When Your Child Feels Comfortable Talking About School?
1. They learn how to navigate difficult situations.
Once your child graduates and goes to college or joins the workforce, they must know how to solve a wide range of problems—from roommate conflicts to misunderstandings at work. If they have years of practice building these interpersonal and problem-solving skills with your support, they will be much more capable as independent adults.
2. They learn that it’s okay to ask for help.
Many children and teens think they can (or should be able to) solve every problem independently. But even adults need to ask for help sometimes! Knowing that it’s okay to ask for help will boost your child’s confidence and help them later in life whenever they need to build a robust support system.
3. Your relationship as parent and child is strengthened.
By regularly listening to your child’s big and small concerns, you’re building a strong, safe relationship with your child. When your child feels they can trust you, they’ll come to you first with questions and problems.
4. The problem is resolved, and they can focus on learning.
Your child can’t learn if he’s worried about being bullied or if she dreads going to algebra class. Once you help them resolve the problem or get them the academic support to get ahead, they can focus on learning.
Strategies for Getting Your Child to Talk About School:
- Share About Your Day
One of the best ways to teach your child a new skill or habit is to model it. Sharing your day with them is no different! Tell your child about what you did or struggled with. Model conversations with your spouse or other family members, and get everybody talking. You’ll normalize the types of discussions you’d like your child to engage in.
- Practice Active Listening
When your child doesn’t talk about their day at school, it’s human nature to pepper them with a rapid-fire series of questions: Well, what did you do at recess? What did you eat for lunch? How was your biology test? Unfortunately, more pressure can leave a child feeling overwhelmed. Instead, wait for them to tell you something about their day—anything—and show that you’re listening by repeating it to them. For example, if they say, “I played with McKenzie on the playground,” you can say, “Oh, you played with McKenzie?” By actively listening, you’ll encourage your child to continue sharing details of their day.
- Ask One or Two Specific Questions
Some kids have trouble telling the story of their day. So many things can happen in one school day, and all the events are a lot to process! While you don’t want to ask a succession of unrelated questions in an attempt to make your child open up, if your child struggles to tell you about their day, ask one or two specific open-ended questions. For example, you might say, “Tell me about your new art teacher,” or “What did your science teacher say about that project you worked so hard on?” Specific questions that don’t immediately default to a “yes” or “no” answer may help prompt your child to think of information to share.
Does Your Child Need Extra Support? Best in Class Is Here to Help.
Once you get your child talking about their day, you might discover they need extra academic help. Whether they could benefit from extra test prep or need a writing tutor, we’ve got you covered. Contact us today to learn more about our supplemental education programs.
